[she shakes her head, and takes a shaky breath, trying to get control of herself.]
Nor does his thanks. I just...don't want to be the cause of anyone dying. I don't want someone to think they have to do anything. Because I know them, I know they'll be unable to let it go.
[like Subaru, throwing himself across the room to fight for Nagito's sake, even though Nagito didn't ask him to do that. like how she herself engaged in pettier things to get even. it's a human desire to balance the scales, to not let things go when it affects someone you care for. and Helena values their care, adores it, treasures them - but it cannot become a tool to lead them into pain and to lead them astray.]
I just want them to keep living. But lying to them for it...I hate having to do it at all.
no subject
[she shakes her head, and takes a shaky breath, trying to get control of herself.]
Nor does his thanks. I just...don't want to be the cause of anyone dying. I don't want someone to think they have to do anything. Because I know them, I know they'll be unable to let it go.
[like Subaru, throwing himself across the room to fight for Nagito's sake, even though Nagito didn't ask him to do that. like how she herself engaged in pettier things to get even. it's a human desire to balance the scales, to not let things go when it affects someone you care for. and Helena values their care, adores it, treasures them - but it cannot become a tool to lead them into pain and to lead them astray.]
I just want them to keep living. But lying to them for it...I hate having to do it at all.